Four videos and a handwritten application
Here’s a little bit about my quest to be on Survivor. I feel silly about how much I love this show — such a great microcosm of humanity.
It’s been my dream to be on this show since episode 1 and a lot of people tell me that I’m made for the show. I think I would make a lot of witty and keen observations during my cameos. I also have some new strategies, one which I explain in the videos. If nothing else, I think fans would enjoy watching the man who cycled the world embarrass himself at the physical challenges. Wish me luck!
Below you can see my Survivor audition tapes and my handwritten application from way back in 2008. By the way, if you want to apply for the show, go to the Survivor Casting website.
Survivor audition tape. Take 6.
Update 2022. Well, so far, I haven’t gotten the call, not yet anyway. BUT!!! I did get officially recognized by CBS as a Survivor Superfan. You can see they liked my post on social media and in a private message they said, “We love your social post about Survivor! We would like to use it in marketing promotion.” Heck. Yeah!
Update 2021: Below is my newest video. I don’t discuss the usual strategies or motivation for being on the show; instead, I just have fun celebrating my birthday with a Survivor-themed party. This may be as close to getting on the show as I get, but I loved it anyway. I even ate a tarantula. (Never again!) I mean — Whoa! — I knew eating a tarantula wouldn’t be any fun, but I totally underestimated just how bad it would be. It was so dry I couldn’t just swallow it. And, by the way, I baked and frosted the cake and built the giant slide puzzle.
Survivor audition tape. Take 5.
New never-before-seen strategy
I’ve never seen this strategy on the show. In this video, I discuss trading my prizes for a promise that people won’t vote for me. Will this strategy backfire? Probably, but it’s worth a try, and it would make some good television.
Survivor audition tape. Take 3.
Survivor audition tape. Take 2.
I’ll admit this video isn’t my favorite. It was hard to cover everything in one minute. And, I was getting tired of saying I rode a bicycle around the world, but I figured that was my key to getting on the show.
Handwritten Survivor application from 2008
At the bottom of the page is my first video from when I applied back in 2008, back when you needed to mail in a video on VHS tape and submit a 20-page application with 9 pages of hand-written answers.
I’m surprised how 11 years can put a whole new perspective on my life and how I portray myself to the world. (A lot of my answers would be different now.) Here are some funny odd questions and answers from my 2008 Survivor application pictured above:
What is your primary motivation for being on the show? What is your secondary motivation for being on the show?
- Personal challenge. People always ask me: “What is your next adventure? How do you beat riding around the world?” [Getting on Survivor is how!]
- Fame & fortune.
If you were stranded, who would you most want to be stranded with?
My girlfriend. A boat builder and expert navigator. [This isn’t a joke. I actually did write “girlfriend” and then thought about it and crossed it off. ]
What would be the craziest, wildest thing you would do for a million dollars?
I think playing a fair, honest, game and helping others play their best game, would be literally crazy in this culture’s mindset. [The producer’s probably thought, “BORING! We need drama. This is television, not life.”]
What would you not do for a million dollars?
Risk personal injury or harm or endanger another.
What is your favorite topic of conversation at a dinner party? What topics are off-limits?
Philosophy. Complaining. [Perhaps if I listed these questions in reverse order, I would have gotten on the show.]
What skills do you bring to Survivor that would make you a useful member of the group?
I am told that I have a genius-level of social awareness. [This sounds really un-genius in retrospect.] Also, I have a sound background of basic survival skills. Strong physically + mentally. Not likely to crack under duress. Can provide physical + mental + emotional comfort.]
List three (3) non-survival related items that you would take with to the remote location, if allowed, and why.
Sunscreen, hat, sunglasses — I don’t want to look like an old man [after spending 39 days in the sun]. Or a book, pencil and paper to stimulate my creativity.
If you could hold any political office, what would it be and why?
Benevolent Dictator of the World. Someone with the common interests of everyone needs to fix this mess. [Ha! Even more true now.]
Describe your perfect day:
Coffee, read a good, mind-opening book, an invigorating bike ride, a few hours of fulfilling work, an earth-shaking self-realization, and finish by relaxing with friends and girlfriend. [I’m impressed with myself on this answer. It’s still true and I’m doing a good job.]
Who is your hero and why?
Everyone I meet has something to teach me. Also, any classic hero like Odin, who sacrificed himself (his ego) to have everything (enlightenment). [That was a profound answer!]
Who would you choose for your loved one’s visit?
Either my girlfriend or my brother.
Survivor audition tape. Take 1.
Below is my first video, I think it’s quite funny. I like how I kept changing my strategy, kind of like being on the real show. I wish I could have gotten some feedback on this because I thought I was a shoo-in.